Urgent and anxious !!!!!!!! 1 fast !!!!!!!!!!! 111
5 thoughts on “A lot of cold jokes!”
Susan
1. Five yuan was kidnapped by the criminal gang, and called a hundred yuan banknote:
"Hey! Your son is here, you don't want us to tear himself with himself!" n n n n n n n n n R N 100 yuan banknotes thought about:
"Tear it, tear you even 5 yuan!" Starved to death, then he picked up the magic lamp.
God lamp: "I can only realize your wish, just say, I hurry up."
people: "I want his wife ..."
The god lamp immediately turned out to be a beauty, and then said disdain: "It's almost starved to death, and they are greedy for beauty!" Sadly! "After that, it disappeared.
people: "... cake."
3, the earthworm family is boring this day, the little earthworm cuts itself into two stages of badminton,
The earthworm mother thinks that this method is good, so cut herself into four sections to play mahjong,
The earthworm father thought about it, and cut herself into minced meat.
The earthworm mother cried and said, "Why are you so stupid? Cut so broken will die!"
The earthworm father said weakly: "... suddenly want to play football. "
4, panda man wants QJ panda woman, panda woman struggle to resist and vowed to die.
The panda man said angrily after the failure of the panda man: "We are almost extinct!"
5, turtle rabbit race ... Rabbit quickly ran to the front It's ...
This to see a snail climb very slowly and slowly ... Say to him: You come up, I will carry you ...
and then ... The snail came up ...
. After a while ... the turtle saw another ant ... say to him: You come up too ...
So the ant also came up.
In the ant came up ... I saw the snail above ... I said to him: Hello
Do you know what the snail is said Intersection
This Snail said: You hurry up, this turtle is so fast .......
6, a pair of men and women are eating dinner
That. That. The girl always asked the boy: Do you love me?
The boy looked at the girl and continued to eat dinner at a glance
. The girl was very angry and asked again: Do you love me?
The boys finally said: Love
The girls asked again: How do you prove?
Suddenly the boy took 30 yuan from his pocket,
and asked the girl: Are you ten yuan?
The girl took ten yuan to the boys ...
The boy put 40 yuan on the table
After a while .....
The girl is very angry and asked the boy: Do you want to prove you love me!
The boy said: I have proved it! Forty in front of you! (This cow!)
7, visiting snack streets a day
found a shop selling egg tower
I want to buy one to try
I asked the clerk: May I ask if this is sold alone?
Counders: No, this is Japan.
8, one day, the family was caught fire,
Ma and mother escaped, and only one son was still inside.
The mother shouted outside the house:
"Son ... what are you doing ... ... "
. The son replied:" I'm wearing socks ... "
Mother said," What socks you wear ... . "
. After five minutes, the son hadn't come out ...
It's all the fire, staying in it ... "
The son said," I'm taking off socks ... "
9, there is yes Personally, I go to the river to fish
I wore a leaves first ~ I did n’t hook it for a long time, and he changed a piece of bread again ~ I did n’t hook it for a long time ~ n Change the earthworm ~ I still have no fish hook for a long time ~~
This herself ~ Pack out 100RMB and fall into the water:
"* -%#%What to eat to eat ! Buy yourself !!! "
10, a German, French, and a Japanese to work in the mine.
The boss is an American. He said to the Germans: You have a good physique and you are responsible for your work.
The Frenchman said: You say you are an engineer, and you are responsible for mining plans.
and said to the Japanese: You are thin. You are responsible for SUPPLIES.
Then every week, they started working.
The days later, the Germans and the French found that the Japanese were gone. After a long time, they decided to go back to work first.
When the Germans started working, the Japanese suddenly jumped out and called:
"Surprise!"
11, "I see, see It's not clear, "the patient said to the ophthalmologist.
"Please come with me," the doctor took the patient to the outside, pointed at the sun in the sky, and asked, "What do you see?"
"The sun "The patient answered.
"How far do you want to see!"
12, one day the animals smelled a stinky taste in front of the Guangong Temple.
The snake said: I will not put such a stinky fart at such a young age.
The cow said: I eat grass and will not put such stinky farts.
The pig said: People who fart will blush.
Suddenly Guan Gong rushed out and said the pigs and said, "How many times have I said, I blushing is natural.
13, someone encountered God a day ...
God suddenly intends to give that person a wish ...
It God asked ...
Me what wishes do you have ...
I heard that the cats have 9 lives ...
In I give me 9 lives ...
God said ...
The real realization of your wishes ...
One day, that person is boring .... ..
It, I want to say that I will die ...
Anyway, there are 9 lives
......
The results of a train driving over ...
that person is still dead ... n n n n n n R n Why is this?
Because there are 10 sections of the carriage of the train ...
14, one day, the funeral home sent three people, which is strange. It's all^_^......
The funeral home administrator asked pol.ice: Why did the face after their death turned out to^_^?
Pol.ice said: This ... say long ... you see the man on the left ... he spends his wife with her wife in the spring night. ..... At the moment of the most passion ... I couldn't stand it ... Hanging
The administrator answered: Well ... Blossoming ... How did the one die in the middle of the ghost?
Pol.ice: The one in the middle ... he ... it is really a tragedy in the world ... he walked on the road ... suddenly hear hear He won the top lottery ... The bonus was more than 700 million ..
. When he laughed happily ... but was hit by the car that came on. ...... Hanging ...
The administrator replied: Well ... he really has no blessing to enjoy this glory In the next half of my life ... what about the rest of this?
Pol.ice: ... This dead is a bit pitiful ... When he climbed up the tree, he was split to death by thunder
The administrator replied: ... This is a bit wrong, why would it laugh when he was chopped by the thunder ...
pol.ice said: Because he climbed up After the tree thought ..... Suddenly a lightning ...
He thought ... someone took a picture of him ...
15, saying thousands of years ago, whether it is a male or bitch, they are squatting when they urinate.
until the Tang Dynasty that things have changed ...
The Tang Taizong has heard it! His old man raised a pair of Beijing dogs. Once Tang Taizong went to Huashan to sacrifice the sky and brought this pair ...
When the sacrifice was half, the bitch suddenly was anxious, so he ran to a tree After solving,
It was a very disrespectful behavior when sacrificing the sky, so it annoyed the Jade Emperor,
The tree fell, and the bitch was pressed. The male dog was very scared after watching it ...
Since then, every time the male dog urinates under the trees, he will stretch out his feet and hold the tree hard against the tree. ,
to prevent the trees from falling down and pressed myself ...: I hate two kinds of people, 1 racial discrimination, 2 black people, 3 unknown people! The village, grabbed Liu Hulan and asked her: said! Who is a member of the Communist Party! Liu Hu Lanyi said justly: I (just) is a member of the Communist Party! I am a member of the Communist Party! is the birth of the hero ~ The person fishing in the past and fishing with only squid.
The squid begged him: You put me, don't bake me to eat.
This said: Okay, let me torture you a few questions.
The squid is very happy to say: You can torture it!
Then the man baked the squid ..
111. Someone went to the river to fish by the river ....
The leaves ~ There is no fish hook for a long time, and he changed the bread again ~ I did n’t hook the fish for a long time ~
The no way he had to change the earthworms ~ I still hook it for a long time ~~
This herself ~ Pack out 100RMB ~~ Plug in the water ~~
"tnnd ~~ What to eat! Go to buy it yourself !!!" 112. One day, Mr. Wang drove home.
Suddenly, a big running beside him, when he drove beside him, he shouted at him:
, "" Is far away.
Mr.
In seeing the catch up, the driver stretched out his head and shouted at him again:
It's gone.
"Damn, cow B!" Mr. Wang was a little comfortable after scolding, so he stopped chasing.
has drove again for a while,
The Mr. Wang saw that he had just turned on the side of the road. He was curious and slowly drove closer.
I only saw that driver was pressed under the car, and said weakly:
"Buddy, have you driving a big run? Do you know where its brakes are?"
113. I used to have schizophrenia, but now we have recovered ~~~~~~~~
114. He is not sure, ask the examiner:
"turn left?"
Answer: "Right"
So ...
115. One day the mung bean suicide jumped off the 5th floor and flowed a lot of blood and turned into red beans; it has been flowing and becoming soybeans again;
116. Xiaoming raised his hair. The next day came to school, the students saw his new hairstyle and laughed: Xiaoming, your head shape is like a kite! Xiaoming felt very wronged and ran outside and crying. Crying and crying ~ He flew up ...
117. There are people who look like onions with a person, cry when walking .... R 118. Little One day the penguin asked his grandma, "Grandma Grandma, am I a penguin?" "Yeah, of course you are penguins." The little penguin asked Dad again, "Dad, dad, am I a penguin?" " Yes, you are a penguin, what's wrong? "" But, how do I feel so cold? "
119. There is a pair of corn in love ...
So they decided to decide Marriage ...
The day of marriage ...
The corn can't find another corn ...
Do you see our corn?
The popcorn: Dear, people wore a wedding dress ....
120. Qu
Imming Xiaohua: "Do you understand music?"
Xiaohua: "Yes" n Xiaoming: "Then you know What is the teacher playing? "
Xiaohua:" Piano. "
121. Two people fell into the trap. ?
a: Call for life!
122. Someone looks like sweet potatoes, walking and falling down ...
123. Question: What are you afraid of cloth and paper?
The Answer: Fare of 10,000, just in case of paper.
The reason: not (cloth) afraid of 10,000, only (paper) in case.
124. One day, a mother -in -law took a car ...
. Sitting on the way my mother -in -law didn't know the way ....
Where is this?
Driver: This is my ass ... ..
125. A egg goes to the teahouse to drink tea. As a result, it becomes a tea egg; a egg runs to Songhuajiang to swim, As a result, it became a pine flower egg; a egg ran to Shandong, and the result became Lu (braised) eggs; an egg could not be returned, and it turned into a wild egg; an egg accidentally fell on the road and fell one by one on the road. Wrestling, fell to the ground, and turned into a missile; an egg ran to the yard of others, and the result became an atomic bomb; an egg ran to the Qinghai -Tibet Plateau, and the result became a hydrogen bomb; an egg was sick, and the result became a result of becoming a egg. Bad guy; an egg married, the result became a bastard; an egg ran to the river to swim, and the result became a nuclear bomb; an egg ran to the flower bush, and the result became Huadan; , Holding a knife, it turned out that he was a knife and horse; an egg was a mother, and it was ugly, and the result became a dinosaur egg; an egg was male. His wife adultered to other eggs outside. Become a bastard; an egg ...
126. The host asked: Will the cat climb the tree? Eagle answer: Yes! Moderator: Example! Eagle with tears: That year, I fell asleep, and the cat climbed up the tree ... Later, I had an owl ...
127. Buy the toilets of 50 miles, eat enough every day! B said: You are so vulgar! If I win a big prize, I will include a living person and eat fresh every day!
128.Why The Chicken Cross the Street
Is to get another size
129. ? "
Student:" Because ... because, my mother fell off the stairs ... "
teachers:" Oh! So that, mother was injured, so you didn’t have it. Here. "
Student:" No ... my dad was injured. "
Te teacher:" Why do your mother fall off the stairs? n Student: "Because .. My dad has a woman outside ..."
Teacher: "What ?. What does it have to do with your mother fall off the stairs?"
Student: "Because they fight .. My mother fell and my dad was injured by my mother."
teacher: Hospital, so I didn't come to class? "
Student:" No .. It was the woman outside sent my dad. "
? "
Student:" Because I have slept my head ... "
teacher:" What does it have to do with your mother fall off the stairs!? " n Student: "No, I ... I just mention it by the way."
130. A haze late at night ... .. r Playing with discs in the dormitory, suddenly
Intersection Intersection
The sisters on the floor hurriedly ran into their bedroom
The saw the plates on their tables turned at a strange speed
speed It's amazing, and it's shocking.
"Bad! What are you doing?"
n "Allah ..." The schoolmates said
"Ala just asked how fast it could turn to the fastest ...?"
131. A: What is that person doing?
B: He is shaking.
: Why should he tremble?
B: He is cold.
: Oh, it turned out that it would not be cold when trembling.
: ...
132. There is a banana and a girlfriend to date, walking on the street, the weather is very hot, and Mr. Banana takes off his clothes. After that, he The girlfriend fell ...
133. A sausage was locked in the refrigerator
feeling very cold, and then looked at the other around me Click comfort, saying, "See you frozen like this, the whole body is ice!" As a result, the root said, "I'm sorry, I am a popsicle."
134. The ball has been playing for a long time. He said: So tired, I think I am softened by me ............
135. Turning in three weeks to connect to the sky, three and a half weeks, three and a half weeks, one month after three and a half weeks.
136. On the day, Zoro went to the mistress and mistress. The mistress asked Zoror: "If my husband is back, what should I do?
" Zorro said, "It's okay, if your husband comes back, I will jump from the window. Connect me. "
This said: If I hear three knocks on the door, my husband is back.
Zorro said: I know. After a while, it was raining. Suddenly, "咚,, 咚" knocked on the door. It was late, that was fast. Zoro jumped down from the bed, and in a blink of an eye, he had jumped out of the window. Seeing that Zoro had left, the mistress went to open the door.
It saw a horse standing in front of the door and said to her, "You tell Zoro, it is raining outside, I wait for him in the corridor."
137 . In the past, someone was called Xiao Cai. It was put all night, and it was ah ~~~~~~
138. nThe person's elephant chocolate, I was eaten when I walked
The personal like a light bulb, I walked away, it was on
Called Xiaohua, I was picked when I walked
The person was called Coke. When I walked, I was drank
139.mm to find a university. Meet a professor of literary texture.
mm: Excuse me, how can I go to college?
The professor: Only when you work hard can you go to college.
140. Every time I look at you in stockings ...
The feelings in my heart,
that is ...
The radish also covers plastic wrap !!!
141. Male: I really love you, please be my girlfriend !!
women: But I do n’t feel about you at all !!
Male: Okay, you tell me which is not good, I change it !!! n women : Then you tell me what is good, I change !!!
142. The director and the section chief took the elevator. The section chief said: It's not me to put
... soon the section chief was removed from office, and the director said at the meeting: You ca n’t afford the big things, how do you use it?
143. In fact, the Olympic mascot should be designed as "a million male teacher over the river", a total of one million, and the form is different. If you buy it at a time, you have to buy 1 million. , Early ...
144. Miss: Now the business is not easy to do!
Boss: Why?
Miss: "Bird flu ..."
145. A woman shaking the robber and said: "I am XX, just graduated, I didn’t find it at work. Really There is no money ... "
The robbers cried after listening," Girl, I am also XX, you get a good student ID, the robbery in front is XX, you can rest assured, Allah never grabbed People yourself! "
145's XX can be freely replaced with the name of your own school or unit ............
146. Help to keep warm?
Answer: Eating some cotton helps to keep warm ~~~~~~~
147. I want to have girlfriend ml, my girlfriend said that I can’t take a bath, I can wash it in cold. "Local", after washing, my girlfriend said very coquettishly: "My dear, you're lazy, where to wash ..." After listening to the faint, I just brushed my teeth ~~~
PS: Minors, please automatically skip this joke ............................
148. A blind beggar wore sunglasses and begged on the street.
The drunk man came over and felt that he was pitiful, so he threw a hundred yuan for him.
. After walking for a while, the drunk man turned around and saw that the blind man was distinguishing the true and false of the 100 yuan copy facing the sun.
Is drunk man to recapture the money: "You don't want to live anymore, you dare to lie to Lao Tzu!"
Ah, I took a look here for a friend. He was a blind man and went to the toilet. In fact, I was a dumb. "
" Oh, this is the case, "So the drunk man threw the money and left the money , Walking away again ...
149. Bird flu -all caused by "shit" !!!
The chance of the great chance -1. "Beast and Beast"; 2. "Beast and Beasts" ....
150. N 151.gdp is as fast as beard, and the wages are as slow as the eyebrows!
152.a: Hey, how do you learn to smoke?
b: I will have to eat forbidden fruit from Adam Eve ~
c: Do you know why Aza Eve is stealing the banned fruit?
ab: I don't know!
c: Because Adam has no cigarettes! (Tip: The word homophonic)
153. Someone was just abandoned by his girlfriend, and happened to see his ex -girlfriend and Xinhuan flirting on the street. So he was very polite and greeted him, and said to his girlfriend Xinhuan very contempt: "You're not disliked the old goods I have used!" When he was proud of himself, his ex -girlfriend laughed: "One inch outside is old, all new inside!"
154. In this season, can you do my bird flu?
155. Warmly celebrate our school ’s cafeteria rebate promotion at the end of the year!
I had to participate in the award -5 hair coins, but I found it in the dish!
156. Second -hand university high -counting textbooks to be sold, 90 % new, with transcripts as evidence!
157. When breaking up, she gave me a kiss, which felt like the real people of the People's Daily ...
158. There is a similar similar to the sister's computer screen just to see the sister's computer screen The text of the news rolling bar is very fast.
It occasionally ask: Is this lyrics?
Master Sister: Yes!
The sister: How do you live so fast? Nothing clearly!
Sister: Jay Chou! Intersection
159. A person who has a person like a phone, walks when he walks ...
The people like dumplings, and they were wrapped when they walked ...
160. Wife: I am really blind and step on the shit to marry you.
Buki: I am really blind and step on the shit before marry you.
This shit: I am unlucky! Lying there by your two are stepped on ...
161. String a snack street a day ...
E every one looks very delicious and delicious, I want to buy one to try ...
I asked the clerk: "Is this single sold?"
Outcomer: "No, this is Japan's" ~~~~~~
162. Chemistry questions of college entrance examination: A and B can be transformed into each other, B can generate C in boiling water D, D has stinky eggs, ask A, B, C, D each?
I Answer: A is a chicken, b is a raw egg, c is cooked egg, D is of course stinky eggs
163. Which one is the worst of rubber, tiger skin, lion skin?
Answer: rubber.
because of rubber (rubber difference).
164. Q: What is 3 heads and one foot ???
Answer: 3 heads of one foot! Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection
165. The ant went to the desert, why did not leave his footprints on the sand, and only one line was left?
This: Because it is riding a bicycle!
The ants went home from the desert. He didn't notify anyone, but his family knew that he was back! Why!
The Answer: Seeing the bicycles that he stopped downstairs ....
166. One day a female drug addict was caught by the police station, and Police saw that there was tattoos in her hand. Just ask her why you are stabbing your boyfriend's name in his hand. His name is Xiao Liang ... ah .. Is it? Hurry up, say. Did he use it?
I only saw the female drug addict raised her head with an angry eyes
said
.
.
.
.
.
.
This is hate ....
This telling Ala ... After tattoos, it is best not to gain weight again -_- !!
167. A steamed bun was walking on the road. When he was hungry, he went to eat, and then turned into a bun.
This ate a lot of things, diarrhea, and then he turned into a steamed bun.
The buns walked on the road. When a car accident happened, he became a biscuit.
In a bun walking on the road. After a car accident, he became a sandwich biscuits ...
168. After waiting outside the delivery room
Suddenly, after Daming heard a sound of "wow"
, a nurse held his child
Daming quickly asked whether it was a male
The nurse said: "You guess"
"Men?" n "No."
"Female?"
"You are really smart, guessed it in two times."
The car was almost no oil. There was a gas station next to it. When driving, a sudden wind scraped her boyfriend's hat.
Ammei's boyfriend said to her:
"I go to pick up the hat, you can help me cheer."
I heard Xiaomei shouting behind him:
"Come on! Come on!" n170. When a woman applies for a career, the boss asked, "You have a few children, you have a few children. ? "
. She replied:" Five. "
The boss asked:" What do they name? "
Ming, Xiaoming, Xiaoming, Xiaoming, Xiaoming. "
The boss asked:" All call Xiaoming, what do you want to do when you ask them to eat? "
, she said, "That's very simple. As long as I call Xiaoming, they will all come."
The boss asked again, "But if you just call a certain child, what should I do?"
. She said, "That's simpler, I just need to call his last name."
171. He had a car accident, the car hit his head,
The was unconscious for two days and finally woke up.
When he opened his eyes, his wife was beside him.
This holding his wife's hand and said with a long -term voice:
"When I was still a college student, I often made up the test. At that time, it was you around me."
"When all my interviews fail, you cut off the recruitment advertisement for me by my side ...
and can finally be responsible for a very important one During the contract, I messed up because of a small mistake. You were still around me. "
" Then I found a job again after I was unemployed for a while, but I never promoted it, and My efforts are not recognized,
So my position is the same as when I first entered the company, you are still by my side ... "
The eyes flashed with tears.
"Now I encountered a car accident. When I woke up and found that you were still with me, I must tell you some things ..." Weeping. Then, the husband said:
Super classic sneer or Daquan ) The two tomatoes cross the road, one car passes by, one of which is not too late to be flattened, and the other tomato finger Laughs: Dig hahaha, tomato sauce ...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ----------------------------------- rnrn大灰狼说：“我I'm going to eat you !!! "You guess, what's wrong? As a result, the big gray wolf ate the lamb .
4 Stone and rice cake fight The stone flew into the sea when I flew up ...
. In the past, a pair of lover had a lifelong life, but the boys needed to take military service, so they dated the girls and gave the girls a one. diamond ring, and promised to meet the girl today three years later. When I was waiting, the ring was used as a wedding ring. She couldn't wait, she was too sad. She threw the diamond ring into the sea and walked away at . However, the boy actually had been waiting for the girl, but the girl misunderstood the dating place, so she would always succeed For regrets, boys are sad ... After a few years, boys went out to fish, guess what he caught?
year cake !!! ------- -------------------------------------------
There was a duck called Xiaohuang. One day he was hit by a car, and he yelled, "Oh!" Since then, he has become Xiaohuang !!
--- ------------------------------------------
I felt itchy, so I stretched my hands and scratched myself to kill myself ... ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------- rnrn从前从前有一只鸟rnrn他每天都会经过一片玉米田rn but unfortunate
one day the fire in the corn field
All corn turned into popcorn
Small small After the birds fly over ...
thought it was snowing, and it was cold ... (so boring ~~~) n ---------- -------------------------- rnrn阿松和阿柏无事闲聊互道岁月不饶人。
Aatong: "Recalling children's time, the happiest is Children's Day."
Aba: "After ten years is the Youth Festival." n A pine: "It is Father's Day in more than ten years."
1 Why is the silkworm baby rich? ==> Because it will cocoon (frugal) 2. Why does the little white rabbit marry zebra? ==> Because the rabbit mother said that the tattoo is not a good child 3. Taiwan. Taiwan. Taiwan. Taiwan. Taiwan. Taiwan. Taiwan. Taiwan. When can it be unified? ==> When buying instant noodles (uniform instant noodles) 4. What lines do monkeys do not like? ==> Parallel line (because there is no interchange u003Cbanana>) 5. Why is it a chocolate? ==> Because the chocolate stick 6. What would the shark eat it? ==> It became a mung bean paste 7. ==> Cotton swab 8. How did Lin Daiyu die? ==> Step in the sky (falling off the sky in the sky) 9. A pig said, "Come on,", a food? == > Zhu Guli 10. Potato stabbed the buns to be fatal, how about it? ==> It turned into a bean paste (kill) bag 11. What animals love to stick to the wall? ==> Seal (newspaper) 12. Why do fox often wrestle? ==> Because the fox is very cunning (slippery foot) 13.4 Personally playing mahjong in the house, why did the police take 5 people ==> Because they hit people Call "Mahjong" 14. When do you like to drink soda? ==> When you are alone (when you are alone, you will want soda) 15. ? ==> As a result, it turned into tea eggs 16. There is a male deer, which walks, gets faster and faster, how about it? R n17. One day the mung bean suicide jumped off the 5th floor and shed a lot of blood. How about it? ==> It became red beans 18. Why would the aircraft fly so high to the stars? == > Because the stars will flash 19. Corn wants to pursue fashion and get it. What is the result? ==> It becomes popcorn 20. What mice walk with two feet? ==> Mickey Mouse 21. What ducks walk with two feet? ==> All ducks walk with two feet (do you want to say the old duck) 22. Miss's business now is not easy to do. Why? ==> avian flu 23. What kind of people can’t be at the gas station Work? ==> People with oil cavity (oil guns slip) person 25. People wearing golden clothes ==> A shock (gold) person 26. > Wind (Bee) and Nikki (Calendar) 27. A bear came over ==> Prepare (bear) 28. (Wet) 29. There are ten sheep, nine squatting in the sheep rim ==> suppressing the frustration (one sheep squatting wrong) 30. How to make the sparrow quiet? ==> r n31. What is the sword of transparent sword? ==> I can't see (sword) 32. What the chief of African cannibals eats, Answer: Eat people, what about the chief? ==> Eat Plants r 33. Why is there no dinosaur now? ==> Dinosaurs went to make a movie 34. Xiaobai is very similar to his brother, know why? ==> really like Dabai 35. Jiang Swimming, how about? ==> It turned into Songhua egg 36. One egg ran to Shandong, how about it? ==> It turned into Lu (braised) eggs 37. There is an egg without no eggs. Home can be returned, how about? ==> It has become a wild egg 38. A egg accidentally fell on the road and fell to the ground. How about it? 39. One egg ran to the flowers, how about it? ==> It turned into Huadan 40. There was an egg to swim in the Dead Sea, how about it? ==> R n41. Xiaoming and Xiaohua went to the seaside to tell a joke. After the joke, they died, why? ==> Because of the tsunami (laughs) 42. Why do n’t the man go out? ==> Because because As soon as you go out, you will change the door. The Titani broke 45. How to make the ducks not fly away? ==> insert a wings to give it (wing difficult to fly) 46. Phone) 47. Ma Jiajue once said to me privately: "The dull knife is the most lethal", why? ==> Because it is a hammer 48. ? ==> Houyi shot for nine days, even if the fairy can't stand it 49. Xiao Hei, Xiao Bai, Xiaohuang, Xiaohong four people take planes, who will faint the opportunity to vomit? ==> Little white rabbit (vomiting) 50. There was a fat man jumping from the high -rise building, what was the result? ==> It became a dead fat man 51. Two people fell into the trap. What is the name of the living person? ==> life -saving 52. Which one is the worst of rubber, tiger skin, lion skin? ==> rubber rubbing (rubber difference) 53. What are the fear of cloth and paper? => No (cloth) I'm afraid of 10,000, only (paper) in case of 54. The guest who appeared below is the pride of our Chinese man, a singer, guess who is it? ==> Ancient giant chickens 55. Which song lyrics have "Li Yan"? ==> The moon represents my heart (how deep Li I love you) 56. > Because Harry Potter is a wizard (tungsten wire) 57. What Kirin is the best? ==> Ice cream 58. What Kirin runs the fastest? ==> Michelin 59. (Play a foreign star name) ==> Stallong (shit is too strong) 60. The rivers in the city and the countryside are relatively urgent? ==> The countryside, because the rural river is too urgent (why is it too urgent) 61. A, B, C, D, Ding, Wu, Ji, Geng, Xin, which word is the coolest? ==> Ding (thong) 62. ==> I hide your song (pigeon) 63 on the roof. What should I do at 12 pm? ==> Hold the feet of the Buddha, because the feet of the Buddha at the time of the (zero) 64. , That person is the thinner? ==> Rogue (Rogue Professor-Lessy) 65. There is an idiot sitting on a plane and removed the toilet on the plane and throw it out. Guess why? ==> Because he is an idiot 66. How many brothers are there in Aladdin? ==> Three (Araja, Ala B, Alabi) 67. A group of eunuchs chatting, guessing a idiom ==> Non -discourse (no chicken talk) 68. How much is a heart worth? ==> 100 million (one heart) 69. The sun, the moon, the stars are dumb? ==> Stars (the stars in the sky-Lu Binghua) r 69. What is the surname of the pencil? ==> Xiao, cut (Xiao) pencil 70. What color can the most imitate? Red (mill) imitations 71. Who will help you eat after eating? = = = = = = = => Flying Dragon, because Feilong adds 72 in (Tian). A puppy traveled in the desert, but he died, how did he die? Polar urine A puppy traveled in the desert and found the telephone pole. The result was still stretched. Why? ==> Point on the pole "Do not urinate here" The puppy traveled in the desert and found the telephone pole. There was nothing posted on it. The result was still stretched. Why? ==> Many puppies are queuing, not waiting for I found the electric pole, and there was nothing posted on it, and the queue was scheduled. The result was still stretched. Why? ==> Because there are two beautiful dog MMs in the back, he is embarrassed 73. Playing the game will be eliminated? ==> Wolf, because-Tomaro (eliminated wolf) 74. Which is the most flattener of historical figures? ==> Which characters in history are the fastest? ==> Cao Cao (said Cao Cao, Cao Cao is here) 76. The car will fly, please guess a drink ==> coffee (car fly) 77. There is a steamed bun, I ate a meatball, how about it? ==> I changed the buns 78. Who gave the love water? ==> Ah ("Ah, give me a glass of forgetful water") ) ) R n79. There was a white cat and a black cat. The white cat fell into the water. The black cat rescued it. What did the white cat say to the black cat? ==> Meow 80. Xiaoming's grandfather sang while brushing his teeth, why? ==> How many stars are the stars in the sky? ==> Eight (Starbucks Starbucks) 82. Taiwan is part of China (China is part of China (China ( Playing a Chinese herbal medicine name) ==> Angelica 83. Jade Emperor sprayed (hit a city name) ==> Tianjin 84. Why go to the south in autumn? ==> Slow 85. Farmers raised 10 cows, only 19 horn, why? ==> There is a rhino 86. Fat is a well -known diving athlete, but one day he stood on the springboard, but he Don't dare to jump down, why? ==> Because there is no water below 87. A taxi drove normally on the road, but did not violate any traffic rules, but was stopped by a policeman. Why? ==> Police want to rent at 88. What chickens have no wings? ==> Field chicken 89. What to fight is not spending and comfortable? ==> Sleep 90. What is the product of the same day as the validity date? ==> Newspaper 91. What books can not be bought in the bookstore? ==> Lesses 92. N93. The spider fell in love with the butterfly, but the butterfly rejected it. Why? ==> My mother said that it was not a good person all day on the Internet 94. Panda loves the deer deeply, but was rejected when expressing love. Why? ==> Little Deer said timidly: My mother said, all those who wearing sunglasses are bad teenagers 95. Who will not participate in the zoo? => Lion (because the lion "lost" to contact) 96. The fat man takes the sedan chair (the name of the place) ==> Yugoslav 97. Reasons: Mo Wenwei) 98. Who will shed tears when he listened to his mother? ==> Grandpa (Ye Ye) Thinking of the words of mother, sparkling tears 99. There are 2 bees. I fell in love, but then the mother bee married the spider? ==> Because this mother bee fell in love with the Internet 100. It's better during the day, sad at night (one building)
1. A snail climbing on a turtle back with a cockroach Snail said to the cockroach, "Hurry up, this turtle is so fast." 2. A polar bear asked his mother: "Mom, My polar bear? " Mom said," Of course you are polar bears. " It again asking dad:" Dad, am I a polar bear? " R N, he went to ask Grandpa again Grandpa was strange, saying why you asked this question The said, "Because I cold."
1. Five yuan was kidnapped by the criminal gang, and called a hundred yuan banknote:
"Hey! Your son is here, you don't want us to tear himself with himself!"
n n n n n n n n n R N 100 yuan banknotes thought about:
"Tear it, tear you even 5 yuan!" Starved to death, then he picked up the magic lamp.
God lamp: "I can only realize your wish, just say, I hurry up."
people: "I want his wife ..."
The god lamp immediately turned out to be a beauty, and then said disdain: "It's almost starved to death, and they are greedy for beauty!" Sadly! "After that, it disappeared.
people: "... cake."
3, the earthworm family is boring this day, the little earthworm cuts itself into two stages of badminton,
The earthworm mother thinks that this method is good, so cut herself into four sections to play mahjong,
The earthworm father thought about it, and cut herself into minced meat.
The earthworm mother cried and said, "Why are you so stupid? Cut so broken will die!"
The earthworm father said weakly: "... suddenly want to play football. "
4, panda man wants QJ panda woman, panda woman struggle to resist and vowed to die.
The panda man said angrily after the failure of the panda man: "We are almost extinct!"
5, turtle rabbit race ... Rabbit quickly ran to the front It's ...
This to see a snail climb very slowly and slowly ... Say to him: You come up, I will carry you ...
and then ... The snail came up ...
. After a while ... the turtle saw another ant ... say to him: You come up too ...
So the ant also came up.
In the ant came up ... I saw the snail above ... I said to him: Hello
Do you know what the snail is said Intersection
This Snail said: You hurry up, this turtle is so fast .......
6, a pair of men and women are eating dinner
That. That. The girl always asked the boy: Do you love me?
The boy looked at the girl and continued to eat dinner at a glance
. The girl was very angry and asked again: Do you love me?
The boys finally said: Love
The girls asked again: How do you prove?
Suddenly the boy took 30 yuan from his pocket,
and asked the girl: Are you ten yuan?
The girl took ten yuan to the boys ...
The boy put 40 yuan on the table
After a while .....
The girl is very angry and asked the boy: Do you want to prove you love me!
The boy said: I have proved it! Forty in front of you! (This cow!)
7, visiting snack streets a day
found a shop selling egg tower
I want to buy one to try
I asked the clerk: May I ask if this is sold alone?
Counders: No, this is Japan.
8, one day, the family was caught fire,
Ma and mother escaped, and only one son was still inside.
The mother shouted outside the house:
"Son ... what are you doing ... ... "
. The son replied:" I'm wearing socks ... "
Mother said," What socks you wear ... . "
. After five minutes, the son hadn't come out ...
It's all the fire, staying in it ... "
The son said," I'm taking off socks ... "
9, there is yes Personally, I go to the river to fish
I wore a leaves first ~ I did n’t hook it for a long time, and he changed a piece of bread again ~ I did n’t hook it for a long time ~
n Change the earthworm ~ I still have no fish hook for a long time ~~
This herself ~ Pack out 100RMB and fall into the water:
"* -%#%What to eat to eat ! Buy yourself !!! "
10, a German, French, and a Japanese to work in the mine.
The boss is an American. He said to the Germans: You have a good physique and you are responsible for your work.
The Frenchman said: You say you are an engineer, and you are responsible for mining plans.
and said to the Japanese: You are thin. You are responsible for SUPPLIES.
Then every week, they started working.
The days later, the Germans and the French found that the Japanese were gone. After a long time, they decided to go back to work first.
When the Germans started working, the Japanese suddenly jumped out and called:
"Surprise!"
11, "I see, see It's not clear, "the patient said to the ophthalmologist.
"Please come with me," the doctor took the patient to the outside, pointed at the sun in the sky, and asked, "What do you see?"
"The sun "The patient answered.
"How far do you want to see!"
12, one day the animals smelled a stinky taste in front of the Guangong Temple.
The snake said: I will not put such a stinky fart at such a young age.
The cow said: I eat grass and will not put such stinky farts.
The pig said: People who fart will blush.
Suddenly Guan Gong rushed out and said the pigs and said, "How many times have I said, I blushing is natural.
13, someone encountered God a day ...
God suddenly intends to give that person a wish ...
It God asked ...
Me what wishes do you have ...
I heard that the cats have 9 lives ...
In I give me 9 lives ...
God said ...
The real realization of your wishes ...
One day, that person is boring .... ..
It, I want to say that I will die ...
Anyway, there are 9 lives
......
The results of a train driving over ...
that person is still dead ...
n n n n n n R n Why is this?
Because there are 10 sections of the carriage of the train ...
14, one day, the funeral home sent three people, which is strange. It's all^_^......
The funeral home administrator asked pol.ice: Why did the face after their death turned out to^_^?
Pol.ice said: This ... say long ... you see the man on the left ... he spends his wife with her wife in the spring night. ..... At the moment of the most passion ... I couldn't stand it ... Hanging
The administrator answered: Well ... Blossoming ... How did the one die in the middle of the ghost?
Pol.ice: The one in the middle ... he ... it is really a tragedy in the world ... he walked on the road ... suddenly hear hear He won the top lottery ... The bonus was more than 700 million ..
. When he laughed happily ... but was hit by the car that came on. ...... Hanging ...
The administrator replied: Well ... he really has no blessing to enjoy this glory In the next half of my life ... what about the rest of this?
Pol.ice: ... This dead is a bit pitiful ... When he climbed up the tree, he was split to death by thunder
The administrator replied: ... This is a bit wrong, why would it laugh when he was chopped by the thunder ...
pol.ice said: Because he climbed up After the tree thought ..... Suddenly a lightning ...
He thought ... someone took a picture of him ...
15, saying thousands of years ago, whether it is a male or bitch, they are squatting when they urinate.
until the Tang Dynasty that things have changed ...
The Tang Taizong has heard it! His old man raised a pair of Beijing dogs. Once Tang Taizong went to Huashan to sacrifice the sky and brought this pair ...
When the sacrifice was half, the bitch suddenly was anxious, so he ran to a tree After solving,
It was a very disrespectful behavior when sacrificing the sky, so it annoyed the Jade Emperor,
The tree fell, and the bitch was pressed. The male dog was very scared after watching it ...
Since then, every time the male dog urinates under the trees, he will stretch out his feet and hold the tree hard against the tree. ,
to prevent the trees from falling down and pressed myself ...:
I hate two kinds of people, 1 racial discrimination, 2 black people, 3 unknown people!
The village, grabbed Liu Hulan and asked her:
said! Who is a member of the Communist Party!
Liu Hu Lanyi said justly:
I (just) is a member of the Communist Party! I am a member of the Communist Party!
is the birth of the hero ~
The person fishing in the past and fishing with only squid.
The squid begged him: You put me, don't bake me to eat.
This said: Okay, let me torture you a few questions.
The squid is very happy to say: You can torture it!
Then the man baked the squid ..
111. Someone went to the river to fish by the river ....
The leaves ~ There is no fish hook for a long time, and he changed the bread again ~ I did n’t hook the fish for a long time ~
The no way he had to change the earthworms ~ I still hook it for a long time ~~
This herself ~ Pack out 100RMB ~~ Plug in the water ~~
"tnnd ~~ What to eat! Go to buy it yourself !!!"
112. One day, Mr. Wang drove home.
Suddenly, a big running beside him, when he drove beside him, he shouted at him:
, "" Is far away.
Mr.
In seeing the catch up, the driver stretched out his head and shouted at him again:
It's gone.
"Damn, cow B!" Mr. Wang was a little comfortable after scolding, so he stopped chasing.
has drove again for a while,
The Mr. Wang saw that he had just turned on the side of the road. He was curious and slowly drove closer.
I only saw that driver was pressed under the car, and said weakly:
"Buddy, have you driving a big run? Do you know where its brakes are?"
113. I used to have schizophrenia, but now we have recovered ~~~~~~~~
114. He is not sure, ask the examiner:
"turn left?"
Answer: "Right"
So ...
115. One day the mung bean suicide jumped off the 5th floor and flowed a lot of blood and turned into red beans; it has been flowing and becoming soybeans again;
116. Xiaoming raised his hair. The next day came to school, the students saw his new hairstyle and laughed: Xiaoming, your head shape is like a kite! Xiaoming felt very wronged and ran outside and crying. Crying and crying ~ He flew up ...
117. There are people who look like onions with a person, cry when walking .... R
118. Little One day the penguin asked his grandma, "Grandma Grandma, am I a penguin?" "Yeah, of course you are penguins." The little penguin asked Dad again, "Dad, dad, am I a penguin?" " Yes, you are a penguin, what's wrong? "" But, how do I feel so cold? "
119. There is a pair of corn in love ...
So they decided to decide Marriage ...
The day of marriage ...
The corn can't find another corn ...
Do you see our corn?
The popcorn: Dear, people wore a wedding dress ....
120. Qu
Imming Xiaohua: "Do you understand music?"
Xiaohua: "Yes"
n Xiaoming: "Then you know What is the teacher playing? "
Xiaohua:" Piano. "
121. Two people fell into the trap. ?
a: Call for life!
122. Someone looks like sweet potatoes, walking and falling down ...
123. Question: What are you afraid of cloth and paper?
The Answer: Fare of 10,000, just in case of paper.
The reason: not (cloth) afraid of 10,000, only (paper) in case.
124. One day, a mother -in -law took a car ...
. Sitting on the way my mother -in -law didn't know the way ....
Where is this?
Driver: This is my ass ... ..
125. A egg goes to the teahouse to drink tea. As a result, it becomes a tea egg; a egg runs to Songhuajiang to swim, As a result, it became a pine flower egg; a egg ran to Shandong, and the result became Lu (braised) eggs; an egg could not be returned, and it turned into a wild egg; an egg accidentally fell on the road and fell one by one on the road. Wrestling, fell to the ground, and turned into a missile; an egg ran to the yard of others, and the result became an atomic bomb; an egg ran to the Qinghai -Tibet Plateau, and the result became a hydrogen bomb; an egg was sick, and the result became a result of becoming a egg. Bad guy; an egg married, the result became a bastard; an egg ran to the river to swim, and the result became a nuclear bomb; an egg ran to the flower bush, and the result became Huadan; , Holding a knife, it turned out that he was a knife and horse; an egg was a mother, and it was ugly, and the result became a dinosaur egg; an egg was male. His wife adultered to other eggs outside. Become a bastard; an egg ...
126. The host asked: Will the cat climb the tree? Eagle answer: Yes! Moderator: Example! Eagle with tears: That year, I fell asleep, and the cat climbed up the tree ... Later, I had an owl ...
127. Buy the toilets of 50 miles, eat enough every day! B said: You are so vulgar! If I win a big prize, I will include a living person and eat fresh every day!
128.Why The Chicken Cross the Street
Is to get another size
129. ? "
Student:" Because ... because, my mother fell off the stairs ... "
teachers:" Oh! So that, mother was injured, so you didn’t have it. Here. "
Student:" No ... my dad was injured. "
Te teacher:" Why do your mother fall off the stairs? n
Student: "Because .. My dad has a woman outside ..."
Teacher: "What ?. What does it have to do with your mother fall off the stairs?"
Student: "Because they fight .. My mother fell and my dad was injured by my mother."
teacher: Hospital, so I didn't come to class? "
Student:" No .. It was the woman outside sent my dad. "
? "
Student:" Because I have slept my head ... "
teacher:" What does it have to do with your mother fall off the stairs!? " n
Student: "No, I ... I just mention it by the way."
130. A haze late at night ... .. r
Playing with discs in the dormitory, suddenly
Intersection Intersection
The sisters on the floor hurriedly ran into their bedroom
The saw the plates on their tables turned at a strange speed
speed It's amazing, and it's shocking.
"Bad! What are you doing?"
n "Allah ..." The schoolmates said
"Ala just asked how fast it could turn to the fastest ...?"
131. A: What is that person doing?
B: He is shaking.
: Why should he tremble?
B: He is cold.
: Oh, it turned out that it would not be cold when trembling.
: ...
132. There is a banana and a girlfriend to date, walking on the street, the weather is very hot, and Mr. Banana takes off his clothes. After that, he The girlfriend fell ...
133. A sausage was locked in the refrigerator
feeling very cold, and then looked at the other around me Click comfort, saying, "See you frozen like this, the whole body is ice!" As a result, the root said, "I'm sorry, I am a popsicle."
134. The ball has been playing for a long time. He said: So tired, I think I am softened by me ............
135. Turning in three weeks to connect to the sky, three and a half weeks, three and a half weeks, one month after three and a half weeks.
136. On the day, Zoro went to the mistress and mistress. The mistress asked Zoror: "If my husband is back, what should I do?
" Zorro said, "It's okay, if your husband comes back, I will jump from the window. Connect me. "
This said: If I hear three knocks on the door, my husband is back.
Zorro said: I know. After a while, it was raining. Suddenly, "咚,, 咚" knocked on the door. It was late, that was fast. Zoro jumped down from the bed, and in a blink of an eye, he had jumped out of the window. Seeing that Zoro had left, the mistress went to open the door.
It saw a horse standing in front of the door and said to her, "You tell Zoro, it is raining outside, I wait for him in the corridor."
137 . In the past, someone was called Xiao Cai. It was put all night, and it was ah ~~~~~~
138. nThe person's elephant chocolate, I was eaten when I walked
The personal like a light bulb, I walked away, it was on
Called Xiaohua, I was picked when I walked
The person was called Coke. When I walked, I was drank
139.mm to find a university. Meet a professor of literary texture.
mm: Excuse me, how can I go to college?
The professor: Only when you work hard can you go to college.
140. Every time I look at you in stockings ...
The feelings in my heart,
that is ...
The radish also covers plastic wrap !!!
141. Male: I really love you, please be my girlfriend !!
women: But I do n’t feel about you at all !!
Male: Okay, you tell me which is not good, I change it !!!
n women : Then you tell me what is good, I change !!!
142. The director and the section chief took the elevator. The section chief said: It's not me to put
... soon the section chief was removed from office, and the director said at the meeting: You ca n’t afford the big things, how do you use it?
143. In fact, the Olympic mascot should be designed as "a million male teacher over the river", a total of one million, and the form is different. If you buy it at a time, you have to buy 1 million. , Early ...
144. Miss: Now the business is not easy to do!
Boss: Why?
Miss: "Bird flu ..."
145. A woman shaking the robber and said: "I am XX, just graduated, I didn’t find it at work. Really There is no money ... "
The robbers cried after listening," Girl, I am also XX, you get a good student ID, the robbery in front is XX, you can rest assured, Allah never grabbed People yourself! "
145's XX can be freely replaced with the name of your own school or unit ............
146. Help to keep warm?
Answer: Eating some cotton helps to keep warm ~~~~~~~
147. I want to have girlfriend ml, my girlfriend said that I can’t take a bath, I can wash it in cold. "Local", after washing, my girlfriend said very coquettishly: "My dear, you're lazy, where to wash ..." After listening to the faint, I just brushed my teeth ~~~
PS: Minors, please automatically skip this joke ............................
148. A blind beggar wore sunglasses and begged on the street.
The drunk man came over and felt that he was pitiful, so he threw a hundred yuan for him.
. After walking for a while, the drunk man turned around and saw that the blind man was distinguishing the true and false of the 100 yuan copy facing the sun.
Is drunk man to recapture the money: "You don't want to live anymore, you dare to lie to Lao Tzu!"
Ah, I took a look here for a friend. He was a blind man and went to the toilet. In fact, I was a dumb. "
" Oh, this is the case, "So the drunk man threw the money and left the money , Walking away again ...
149. Bird flu -all caused by "shit" !!!
The chance of the great chance -1. "Beast and Beast"; 2. "Beast and Beasts" ....
150. N
151.gdp is as fast as beard, and the wages are as slow as the eyebrows!
152.a: Hey, how do you learn to smoke?
b: I will have to eat forbidden fruit from Adam Eve ~
c: Do you know why Aza Eve is stealing the banned fruit?
ab: I don't know!
c: Because Adam has no cigarettes! (Tip: The word homophonic)
153. Someone was just abandoned by his girlfriend, and happened to see his ex -girlfriend and Xinhuan flirting on the street. So he was very polite and greeted him, and said to his girlfriend Xinhuan very contempt: "You're not disliked the old goods I have used!" When he was proud of himself, his ex -girlfriend laughed: "One inch outside is old, all new inside!"
154. In this season, can you do my bird flu?
155. Warmly celebrate our school ’s cafeteria rebate promotion at the end of the year!
I had to participate in the award -5 hair coins, but I found it in the dish!
156. Second -hand university high -counting textbooks to be sold, 90 % new, with transcripts as evidence!
157. When breaking up, she gave me a kiss, which felt like the real people of the People's Daily ...
158. There is a similar similar to the sister's computer screen just to see the sister's computer screen The text of the news rolling bar is very fast.
It occasionally ask: Is this lyrics?
Master Sister: Yes!
The sister: How do you live so fast? Nothing clearly!
Sister: Jay Chou! Intersection
159. A person who has a person like a phone, walks when he walks ...
The people like dumplings, and they were wrapped when they walked ...
160. Wife: I am really blind and step on the shit to marry you.
Buki: I am really blind and step on the shit before marry you.
This shit: I am unlucky! Lying there by your two are stepped on ...
161. String a snack street a day ...
E every one looks very delicious and delicious, I want to buy one to try ...
I asked the clerk: "Is this single sold?"
Outcomer: "No, this is Japan's" ~~~~~~
162. Chemistry questions of college entrance examination: A and B can be transformed into each other, B can generate C in boiling water D, D has stinky eggs, ask A, B, C, D each?
I Answer: A is a chicken, b is a raw egg, c is cooked egg, D is of course stinky eggs
163. Which one is the worst of rubber, tiger skin, lion skin?
Answer: rubber.
because of rubber (rubber difference).
164. Q: What is 3 heads and one foot ???
Answer: 3 heads of one foot! Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection
165. The ant went to the desert, why did not leave his footprints on the sand, and only one line was left?
This: Because it is riding a bicycle!
The ants went home from the desert. He didn't notify anyone, but his family knew that he was back! Why!
The Answer: Seeing the bicycles that he stopped downstairs ....
166. One day a female drug addict was caught by the police station, and Police saw that there was tattoos in her hand. Just ask her why you are stabbing your boyfriend's name in his hand. His name is Xiao Liang ... ah .. Is it? Hurry up, say. Did he use it?
I only saw the female drug addict raised her head with an angry eyes
said
.
.
.
.
.
.
This is hate ....
This telling Ala ... After tattoos, it is best not to gain weight again -_- !!
167. A steamed bun was walking on the road. When he was hungry, he went to eat, and then turned into a bun.
This ate a lot of things, diarrhea, and then he turned into a steamed bun.
The buns walked on the road. When a car accident happened, he became a biscuit.
In a bun walking on the road. After a car accident, he became a sandwich biscuits ...
168. After waiting outside the delivery room
Suddenly, after Daming heard a sound of "wow"
, a nurse held his child
Daming quickly asked whether it was a male
The nurse said: "You guess"
"Men?"
n "No."
"Female?"
"You are really smart, guessed it in two times."
The car was almost no oil. There was a gas station next to it. When driving, a sudden wind scraped her boyfriend's hat.
Ammei's boyfriend said to her:
"I go to pick up the hat, you can help me cheer."
I heard Xiaomei shouting behind him:
"Come on! Come on!"
n170. When a woman applies for a career, the boss asked, "You have a few children, you have a few children. ? "
. She replied:" Five. "
The boss asked:" What do they name? "
Ming, Xiaoming, Xiaoming, Xiaoming, Xiaoming. "
The boss asked:" All call Xiaoming, what do you want to do when you ask them to eat? "
, she said, "That's very simple. As long as I call Xiaoming, they will all come."
The boss asked again, "But if you just call a certain child, what should I do?"
. She said, "That's simpler, I just need to call his last name."
171. He had a car accident, the car hit his head,
The was unconscious for two days and finally woke up.
When he opened his eyes, his wife was beside him.
This holding his wife's hand and said with a long -term voice:
"When I was still a college student, I often made up the test. At that time, it was you around me."
"When all my interviews fail, you cut off the recruitment advertisement for me by my side ...
and can finally be responsible for a very important one During the contract, I messed up because of a small mistake. You were still around me. "
" Then I found a job again after I was unemployed for a while, but I never promoted it, and My efforts are not recognized,
So my position is the same as when I first entered the company, you are still by my side ... "
The eyes flashed with tears.
"Now I encountered a car accident. When I woke up and found that you were still with me, I must tell you some things ..."
Weeping. Then, the husband said:
I I think ... it was all you took me ... "
Super classic sneer or Daquan
)
The two tomatoes cross the road, one car passes by, one of which is not too late to be flattened, and the other tomato finger
Laughs: Dig hahaha, tomato sauce ...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ----------------------------------- rnrn大灰狼说：“我I'm going to eat you !!! "You guess, what's wrong? As a result, the big gray wolf ate the lamb
.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------
4 Stone and rice cake fight The stone flew into the sea when I flew up ...
. In the past, a pair of lover had a lifelong life, but the boys needed to take military service, so they dated the girls and gave the girls a one.
diamond ring, and promised to meet the girl today three years later. When I was waiting, the ring was used as a wedding ring. She couldn't wait, she was too sad. She threw the diamond ring into the sea and walked away at
. However, the boy actually had been waiting for the girl, but the girl misunderstood the dating place, so she would always succeed
For regrets, boys are sad ... After a few years, boys went out to fish, guess what he caught?
year cake !!!
------- -------------------------------------------
There was a duck called Xiaohuang. One day he was hit by a car, and he yelled, "Oh!" Since then, he has become Xiaohuang
!!
--- ------------------------------------------
I felt itchy, so I stretched my hands and scratched myself to kill myself ...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------- rnrn从前从前有一只鸟rnrn他每天都会经过一片玉米田rn
but unfortunate
one day the fire in the corn field
All corn turned into popcorn
Small small After the birds fly over ...
thought it was snowing, and it was cold ...
(so boring ~~~)
n ---------- -------------------------- rnrn阿松和阿柏无事闲聊互道岁月不饶人。
Aatong: "Recalling children's time, the happiest is Children's Day."
Aba: "After ten years is the Youth Festival." n
A pine: "It is Father's Day in more than ten years."
Abai: "Old Man's Day in more than decades."
Ah Song: "Over decades."
Abai: "Qingming Festival."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------
1 Why is the silkworm baby rich? ==> Because it will cocoon (frugal)
2. Why does the little white rabbit marry zebra? ==> Because the rabbit mother said that the tattoo is not a good child
3. Taiwan. Taiwan. Taiwan. Taiwan. Taiwan. Taiwan. Taiwan. Taiwan. When can it be unified? ==> When buying instant noodles (uniform instant noodles)
4. What lines do monkeys do not like? ==> Parallel line (because there is no interchange u003Cbanana>)
5. Why is it a chocolate? ==> Because the chocolate stick
6. What would the shark eat it? ==> It became a mung bean paste
7. ==> Cotton swab
8. How did Lin Daiyu die? ==> Step in the sky (falling off the sky in the sky)
9. A pig said, "Come on,", a food? == > Zhu Guli
10. Potato stabbed the buns to be fatal, how about it? ==> It turned into a bean paste (kill) bag
11. What animals love to stick to the wall? ==> Seal (newspaper)
12. Why do fox often wrestle? ==> Because the fox is very cunning (slippery foot)
13.4 Personally playing mahjong in the house, why did the police take 5 people ==> Because they hit people Call "Mahjong"
14. When do you like to drink soda? ==> When you are alone (when you are alone, you will want soda)
15. ? ==> As a result, it turned into tea eggs
16. There is a male deer, which walks, gets faster and faster, how about it? R n17. One day the mung bean suicide jumped off the 5th floor and shed a lot of blood. How about it? ==> It became red beans
18. Why would the aircraft fly so high to the stars? == > Because the stars will flash
19. Corn wants to pursue fashion and get it. What is the result? ==> It becomes popcorn
20. What mice walk with two feet? ==> Mickey Mouse
21. What ducks walk with two feet? ==> All ducks walk with two feet (do you want to say the old duck)
22. Miss's business now is not easy to do. Why? ==> avian flu
23. What kind of people can’t be at the gas station Work? ==> People with oil cavity (oil guns slip) person
25. People wearing golden clothes ==> A shock (gold) person
26. > Wind (Bee) and Nikki (Calendar)
27. A bear came over ==> Prepare (bear)
28. (Wet)
29. There are ten sheep, nine squatting in the sheep rim ==> suppressing the frustration (one sheep squatting wrong)
30. How to make the sparrow quiet? ==> r n31. What is the sword of transparent sword? ==> I can't see (sword)
32. What the chief of African cannibals eats, Answer: Eat people, what about the chief? ==> Eat Plants r
33. Why is there no dinosaur now? ==> Dinosaurs went to make a movie
34. Xiaobai is very similar to his brother, know why? ==> really like Dabai
35. Jiang Swimming, how about? ==> It turned into Songhua egg
36. One egg ran to Shandong, how about it? ==> It turned into Lu (braised) eggs
37. There is an egg without no eggs. Home can be returned, how about? ==> It has become a wild egg
38. A egg accidentally fell on the road and fell to the ground. How about it?
39. One egg ran to the flowers, how about it? ==> It turned into Huadan
40. There was an egg to swim in the Dead Sea, how about it? ==> R n41. Xiaoming and Xiaohua went to the seaside to tell a joke. After the joke, they died, why? ==> Because of the tsunami (laughs)
42. Why do n’t the man go out? ==> Because because As soon as you go out, you will change the door. The Titani broke
45. How to make the ducks not fly away? ==> insert a wings to give it (wing difficult to fly)
46. Phone)
47. Ma Jiajue once said to me privately: "The dull knife is the most lethal", why? ==> Because it is a hammer
48. ? ==> Houyi shot for nine days, even if the fairy can't stand it
49. Xiao Hei, Xiao Bai, Xiaohuang, Xiaohong four people take planes, who will faint the opportunity to vomit? ==> Little white rabbit (vomiting)
50. There was a fat man jumping from the high -rise building, what was the result? ==> It became a dead fat man
51. Two people fell into the trap. What is the name of the living person? ==> life -saving
52. Which one is the worst of rubber, tiger skin, lion skin? ==> rubber rubbing (rubber difference)
53. What are the fear of cloth and paper? => No (cloth) I'm afraid of 10,000, only (paper) in case of
54. The guest who appeared below is the pride of our Chinese man, a singer, guess who is it? ==> Ancient giant chickens
55. Which song lyrics have "Li Yan"? ==> The moon represents my heart (how deep Li I love you)
56. > Because Harry Potter is a wizard (tungsten wire)
57. What Kirin is the best? ==> Ice cream
58. What Kirin runs the fastest? ==> Michelin
59. (Play a foreign star name) ==> Stallong (shit is too strong)
60. The rivers in the city and the countryside are relatively urgent? ==> The countryside, because the rural river is too urgent (why is it too urgent)
61. A, B, C, D, Ding, Wu, Ji, Geng, Xin, which word is the coolest? ==> Ding (thong)
62. ==> I hide your song (pigeon)
63 on the roof. What should I do at 12 pm? ==> Hold the feet of the Buddha, because the feet of the Buddha at the time of the (zero)
64. , That person is the thinner? ==> Rogue (Rogue Professor-Lessy)
65. There is an idiot sitting on a plane and removed the toilet on the plane and throw it out. Guess why? ==> Because he is an idiot
66. How many brothers are there in Aladdin? ==> Three (Araja, Ala B, Alabi)
67. A group of eunuchs chatting, guessing a idiom ==> Non -discourse (no chicken talk)
68. How much is a heart worth? ==> 100 million (one heart)
69. The sun, the moon, the stars are dumb? ==> Stars (the stars in the sky-Lu Binghua) r
69. What is the surname of the pencil? ==> Xiao, cut (Xiao) pencil
70. What color can the most imitate? Red (mill) imitations
71. Who will help you eat after eating? = = = = = = = => Flying Dragon, because Feilong adds
72 in (Tian). A puppy traveled in the desert, but he died, how did he die? Polar urine
A puppy traveled in the desert and found the telephone pole. The result was still stretched. Why? ==> Point on the pole "Do not urinate here"
The puppy traveled in the desert and found the telephone pole. There was nothing posted on it. The result was still stretched. Why? ==> Many puppies are queuing, not waiting for
I found the electric pole, and there was nothing posted on it, and the queue was scheduled. The result was still stretched. Why? ==> Because there are two beautiful dog MMs in the back, he is embarrassed
73. Playing the game will be eliminated? ==> Wolf, because-Tomaro (eliminated wolf)
74. Which is the most flattener of historical figures? ==> Which characters in history are the fastest? ==> Cao Cao (said Cao Cao, Cao Cao is here)
76. The car will fly, please guess a drink ==> coffee (car fly)
77. There is a steamed bun, I ate a meatball, how about it? ==> I changed the buns
78. Who gave the love water? ==> Ah ("Ah, give me a glass of forgetful water") ) ) R n79. There was a white cat and a black cat. The white cat fell into the water. The black cat rescued it. What did the white cat say to the black cat? ==> Meow
80. Xiaoming's grandfather sang while brushing his teeth, why? ==> How many stars are the stars in the sky? ==> Eight (Starbucks Starbucks)
82. Taiwan is part of China (China is part of China (China ( Playing a Chinese herbal medicine name) ==> Angelica
83. Jade Emperor sprayed (hit a city name) ==> Tianjin
84. Why go to the south in autumn? ==> Slow
85. Farmers raised 10 cows, only 19 horn, why? ==> There is a rhino
86. Fat is a well -known diving athlete, but one day he stood on the springboard, but he Don't dare to jump down, why? ==> Because there is no water below
87. A taxi drove normally on the road, but did not violate any traffic rules, but was stopped by a policeman. Why? ==> Police want to rent at
88. What chickens have no wings? ==> Field chicken
89. What to fight is not spending and comfortable? ==> Sleep
90. What is the product of the same day as the validity date? ==> Newspaper
91. What books can not be bought in the bookstore? ==> Lesses
92. N93. The spider fell in love with the butterfly, but the butterfly rejected it. Why? ==> My mother said that it was not a good person all day on the Internet
94. Panda loves the deer deeply, but was rejected when expressing love. Why? ==> Little Deer said timidly: My mother said, all those who wearing sunglasses are bad teenagers
95. Who will not participate in the zoo? => Lion (because the lion "lost" to contact)
96. The fat man takes the sedan chair (the name of the place) ==> Yugoslav
97. Reasons: Mo Wenwei)
98. Who will shed tears when he listened to his mother? ==> Grandpa (Ye Ye) Thinking of the words of mother, sparkling tears
99. There are 2 bees. I fell in love, but then the mother bee married the spider? ==> Because this mother bee fell in love with the Internet
100. It's better during the day, sad at night (one building)
The potato killed the bun, and it was called the bean paste.
Depend on. Essence Essence
1. A snail climbing on a turtle back with a cockroach
Snail said to the cockroach, "Hurry up, this turtle is so fast."
2. A polar bear asked his mother: "Mom, My polar bear? "
Mom said," Of course you are polar bears. "
It again asking dad:" Dad, am I a polar bear? "
R N, he went to ask Grandpa again
Grandpa was strange, saying why you asked this question
The said, "Because I cold."